Transcript: Bagels and Lox With El-P

Dinner with the Band
Episode “Bagels and lox with El-P.”

Sam Mason: Hey uh, welcome to Dinner with the Band I am Sam and we are privileged enough to have EL-P and the boys with us today. We decided to throw together some homemade bagels, and uh were actually going to cure our own lox, which is kind of a pain in the ass. But were going to make a bloody Mary to go along, something the boys will drink. I have kind of decided to go with the bagel and lox because of your upbringing.
El-P: Yeah you know it was just we were kind of talking about food that you can’t get anywhere else. Part of my family, the strange part of my family, when I was a kid growing up was my father’s side of the family, before he left us. We used to have these huge Jewish meals. You know it was always these, lox and bagels and stuff. It just seems like Lox and bagels are the one thing that no one outside of New York City can seem to get correct.
Sam Mason: Well you’re on the road a lot so…
The Mighty Quinn: And you got three kids from Brooklyn standing right here, so you know…
Sam Mason: Well you know the bagel came to Brooklyn first.
The Mighty Quin: I’m from crown heights, home of the greatest bagel ever. I’m schmaltz!
El-P: I was actually born on a bagel.
Sam Mason: Were just going to start this on that note. We are just going to make plain bagels today. This is just starting the dough; this is the yeast, its dry active yeast. That’s water and sugar; we are just going to make that yeast real happy. So real quick we are also going to have some malt. It gives you that flavor you are probably used to.
Wilder Zoby Schwartz: Is this the same malt from old, from old English anyhow? No, no we have that in the backroom. Alright oil and salt, and then we are going to slowly stir in this flower. This is bread flower. There it is.
El-P: How many bagels would this make?
Sam Mason: We are going to make probably ten bagels. We are going to slowly whisk that in. This is going to just come together kind of like a dough and we are going to let it sit for fifteen minutes.
So this is that dough we just pulled out, its kind of barely stuck together so we are going to hook it up for like ten or twelve minutes.
El-P: Is this kneading?
Sam Mason: This is kneading, and wanting.
El-P: What’s the purpose of this?
Sam Mason: It’s just to homogenized all the, you know all the flour just to stir it up there. I don’t even know if that was right.
El-P: Are you trying to get air in there too?
Sam Mason: No, no just trying to actually trying to work the air out.
Mr. Dibbs: Can you eat the dough?
Sam Mason: You can eat whatever you want. He eats anything right? That’s part of his shtick.
Wilder Zoby Schwartz: It’s the malt, salt.
Mr. Dibbs: Tastes like dough and gum.
Sam Mason: Alright well let’s finish this up. So you guys cook at home ever, what’s the deal with that?
El-P: I am cooking a lot at home right now just because I am about to go on tour.
The Mighty Quin: your family, your family Christmas recipe was pretty good.
El-P: That’s right we did our…
Sam Mason: You have a favorite recipe for Christmas?
El-P: Yes ignore it. Bah humbug.
Sam Mason: Alright what we are going to do now is we are going to proof this, which just means putting it in a warm place and letting it hang out.
Mr. Dibbs: Putting it in a warm place? I have a warm place; the fudge tub is very warm.
Sam Mason: What’s the temperature in there man?
Mr. Dibbs: 108.
Sam Mason: That’s actually perfect. So we cover this for about fifteen minutes. Now we are going to o cured salmon. You are probably familiar with smoked lox; we don’t necessarily have the capabilities of smoking today. I mean we can smoke some shit, but it’s not going to have anything to do with salmon.
El-P: More to do with crack?
Sam Mason: Yes, Yes we have, it’s going to be in glass, it’s going to work out very well. So this is just a half and half blend of brown sugar and kosher salt.
El-P: This is for the salmon?
Sam Mason: Mmm hmm, we got this from a rabbi. This has been blessed, or it’s been, he definitely knows it’s around. This is going to be salmon. Alright so the first thing we are going to do is actually get rid of some of these scales. There kind of disgusting. You guys aren’t home very much, what do you guys eat when you’re out. Well something about rituals and eating on the road is, you know you are forced to eat with each other basically every day. Usually eating is heating up a hot pocket on the bus.
Sam Mason: you guys have a microwave on the bus?
El-P: It’s not as luxurious as it sounds.
Sam Mason: Alright so we just put some slices in the back so we don’t have to worry about skin preventing absorption. All right now we are going to cover it with the sugar. Now what this is going to do is this pulls all the moisture out of the fish, this actually kinds of starts the preserving process. You know back in the day they used to do this because you could leave fish out at room temperature for weeks, which is still kind of creepy to me.
El-P: Or when you’re at someone’s house and you eat a piece of fish that’s been on someone’s counter for a week.
Sam Mason: And you don’t really know where they got it from. Alright so this is going to sit in here for twelve hours. Obviously you guys can smoke a cigarette if you want.
El-P: So we are a rap.
Sam Mason: Were going to go back to our dough, were going to do this efficiently.
El-P: Hell yea.
Sam Mason: Right, right?
El-P: I’m ready.
Sam Mason: I’m going to cut this into, uh, twelve, right. That way we all get to make a bagel. So we are going to take the dough, and it just gets rolled real tight, on its self.
Mr. Dibbs: Smearing it on its self.
Sam Mason: you keep rocking it back. You haven’t even picked it up yet.
Wilder Zoby Schwartz: I can make It wet if you want.
El-P: Don’t encourage him man.
Sam Mason: You heel your hands like that, then turn it, and heel it again.
Wilder Zoby Schwartz: How do you know you have done this for long enough?
Sam Mason: You have done it for long enough that’s perfect. And just if its round and has got a hole in it. Alright now that we made our bagels, were going to put them on a sheet and let them rise.
El-P: Awesome.
Sam Mason: No these are perfect.
Wilder Zoby Schwartz: This one is a little sad. But I kind of like it.
Sam Mason: No, no, no, it’s called character.
The Mighty Quin: I kind of like a funny looking dude.
Sam Mason: I call it character, it will hold more salt. Alright these are going to prove it, and were going to brine the locks we had. So we have the locks, kind of lurking under this.
El-P: What does brine mean?
Sam Mason: Brine is when you cook it in salt and water, you really cure it. We are really getting rid of the salt and moisture. Quart of water, we are going to bring to a boil, and we are going to add one and a half pounds of kosher salt, which is a shit load of salt for that much water. It won’t dissolve, but the fact that it won’t dissolve means that it is super saturated.
Now once again that fish is supposed to stay in the salt for twelve hours. But we already have a piece done. I have actually made this over the course of the week. So that has actually been cured for twelve hours, and then brined for twelve hours. And you end up with this; really cool I mean this can sit out at room temperature for ever. Now Lets see what our bagels are doing.
Mr. Dibbs: There not bad at all!
Sam Mason: I have water over there boiling, approximately eight quarts of water boiling. We are going to add two or three tablespoons of the malt, bastards hot. Now we don’t necessarily want to be boiling we are going to drop it to a simmer.
El-P: What exactly is a simmer?
Sam Mason: A simmer is when you don’t see any bubbles you just have steam. We will do two at time, a minute on each side.
El-P: Do you flip them?
Sam Mason: Yeah.
El-P: Before I release demy first record, like right before I released my first record, in the end I was so dirt stinking poor. I had about ten dollars to my name a day. And what I would do is I would wake up, at 5:0 0pm, and go out and I would spend my dollar on my bagel, and my dollar on my large coffee. Sit on the stoop watch the sunset. Then go buy a nickel bag of weed and a 40oz, and um. I think that was about all I had to eat for about two years.
Sam Mason: No shit.
El-P: So me and bagels were, you know…
Sam Mason: Were tight? Alright so yeah about a minute and uh if you feel them there kind of like wet dough, there like matzaball actually and instead of leaving it in the soup it’s going to be baked.
Wilder Zoby Schwartz: And what is, why are you boiling them?
El-P: Because that’s uh, how bagels are made man.
Wilder Zoby Schwartz: No I understand but your going to bake them.
Sam Mason: No it gives them that crust you know that skin that shininess. Now they are going to go in a 450 degree oven, boom. Alright so the bagels will be done here momentarily we will get together. We obviously have the lox’s, which we have in nice slices, paper thin. We are going to serve capers, some cream cheese, some chives. It’s like a Sunday. Let’s actually take a look at this salmon.
El-P: Are there ways to flavor or cure the salmon?
Sam Mason: Well yes, quite a few, it goes back so long every body’s done it differently. Its like different families have different ways of doing it. You can have grab locks, which is usually herb encrusted, with juniper and dill and stuff. So we will just lay out a bunch of pieces like this and just kind of keep it off the skin, the skins going to stay right there. Now what we are actually going to do is take these bagels. They should be done. There a little overcooked; they ended up losing there whole. Rock out like this boom.
Mr. Dibbs: Looks perty.
El-P: That looks good as hell.
Sam Mason: Alright there you have it, homemade bagels and cream cheese, and lox and capers.
El-P: Yeah.
Sam Mason: Yeah, bring it.